Peter Redux

And I hear the rooster crowing times three:
these three clanging crows, though brief,
will persecute me across land and sea,
and batter my heart without lee.
I am the betrayer; the criminal; the thief.
I sat once in high places; I fell, like a leaf
all at once, but slowly, if you please.
It was a steep fall, but gradual, by degrees.

My fall was sudden, like an unexpected death:
so sudden, it took away my breath.
My fall was tragic, like Macbeth,
and left me, with me, appalled:
I felt unworthy of myself,
and from my self strange parted.
But still, in all, 'twas a lazy languid fall
like the way a snowflakes descends.
I can't remember when it started;
I can't remember when it ends.

After the fall, I surveyed my soul
to count the cost of my demise.
I found, to my surprise:
now that I was worse, I was much better;
now so young, I suddenly felt old.
now so sick, I suddenly felt whole.
When I was well is when I fell;
when I fell, I knew I was not well.

The grace that kills is the grace that feels
is the grace that stills, and wills, and seals.
The grace that nears is the grace that sears
is the grace that teaches hearts to fear.
The grace so dear, is the grace so clear,
is the grace that has the ears to hear.

'Twas grace taught my heart my heart was dark;
'Twas grace rending to heal: grace great; grace stark.

The grace that heals is the grace that tears the world apart.

I suppose it all comes down to this:
our faith in our strength was a wish.
In the courtroom we tried to dismiss
all the charges that mortal men cope.
Then grace severe fell sweet like a kiss
as our crimes were read from a bottomless list,
and we abandoned at last our last hope.
Grace prosecuted; grace cried for justice;
grace was the judge; grace was the rope
fashioned to save us the moment it hanged us.
I believe in grace, but no longer in me.
Grace held me captive so grace might set me free.

'Twas grace taught my heart my heart was dark;
'Twas grace rending to heal: grace great; grace stark.

The grace that heals is the grace that tears the world apart.